IAAP Newsletter:The Unified Field
Volume 6, Number 1
Joseph Antell
Loving Yourself – Honoring Your Field
How many people take the time to simply love themselves first and know how to honor their own fields of energy, which includes the body, mind and especially the heart? When was the last time you put your arms around you and gave yourself a huge hug or looked into the mirror and, to quote Billy Crystal, said "You look marvelous!" If we ever dare to look into a full-length mirror maybe we comfort ourselves by saying, "You're doing the best you can with what you've got." or "Oh my God!" There are few, I would guess, who would stretch their arms out and say, "Behold the miracle!"
For the most part during the critical first seven years of our lives, our family members clothe who we are, how we are, and why we are here. Our own sense of what is really true about our being, our spirit, in this lifetime gets lost in a sea of comments and influences by those closest to us–the ones we are innocently and, for the most part, completely open to, i.e., "You look just like my side of the family." "You are behaving just like your Uncle Mike." "He will probably become a lawyer; he really should." Through those years we come to know ourselves in a seemingly authentic way by how others see us. The next seven years are spent being influenced by our friends, teachers, coaches and religious authorities. Then in the teenage years we start to rebel, or at least separate ourselves to whatever degree, so we can sort through all of this as best we can. At about age 21, we are told to embrace the world and do something with our lives. Be successful, get rich, stay healthy and try to be happy. This is the earthly hereditary pattern that we have accepted, at least in our culture.
There is a different hereditary pattern that permeates all. It says, "You are a precious spirit in this world, one who carries the power and influence of love. In all of the universe there is no other being like you. Your beautiful presence in this whole tapestry is greatly valued. Thank you for coming to be here–I love you!" These words reflect the voice of the Great Beloved. As we take time to look in the mirror each day and extend this blessing to ourselves, something else awakens in us. As we see and know ourselves with this clarity of vision, the world is truly full of light.
To enhance bringing this current to our bodies, minds, and hearts, I have been working with a process of self Attunement that I have found helpful. I visualize standing in back of Joseph, me, and put my right (power or primary) hand over my pineal gland, placing my left (contact or support) hand on the left cervical. I hold myself lovingly in this embrace for five to ten minutes. Then I place my right hand over my thymus gland and my left hand over my pineal gland for another five to ten minutes, allowing what resonates out of the first position of my heaven to then be established in the earth of my body through the gateway we know as the heartthymus. In completing this brief ceremony I know that this influence of loving enfoldment follows and surrounds me throughout my day. I usually repeat this process at night as I move into my hours of rest. I trust this helps you discover unique ways to love yourself.
—JA
Vicki Barbour
Grief Part Two of Four Parts
In part one, I discussed the two main myths and misinformation around grief: Bury your feelings and replace the loss. In this part, I'll discuss what many people who are wellÐintentioned will say to grievers. Remember, grief is a natural emotion in response to a loss; it isn't an intellectual thought. Yet, we say or hear statements that may be true to the mind, but have no connection to the heart. "Be thankful you have another son." "He led a full life." "It's only a dog." It's true that my friend lived a full life, but he died at 35 and I would have much rather he lived another 35- plus years of a full life! And yes, it's true that Gonzo was a dog, but he was also a major part of the family providing unconditional love.
"It's God's will." "She's in a better place." Really? Maybe, but it still doesn't help the heart. How about this one? "You're never given anything you cannot handle." Or "You'll find someone else."
One of the worst things that one can say is, "I know how you feel." Each loss is SO unique. And each person's reaction is unique, even to the same loss. How you felt when your grandmother died may be completely different from how I felt when mine died. Or my sense of loss was totally different from my brother's when our uncle died. Each relationship is different. We don't really know how another is feeling. At best, we only know how we felt when we experienced the loss.
So what to say or do? You can ask what happened to cause the loss and then be fully present to listen without interruption, analysis, criticism or judgment. Pretend you're a heart with big ears and no mouth. Grievers aren't broken, they don't need to be fixed. Next part: STERBS (Short-Term Energy Relief Behaviors). Recommended reading: The Grief Recovery Handbook, by John W. James and Russell Friedman.
—VB
